Contiki was feral!
We had a meeting at the royal national before Contiki which was good because I met 2 girls Emily and Katie and we had dinner together. We went back to our rooms fairly early because we had to be downstairs at the bus by 6am. At 6am that morning Ryan, Aaron and Lloydy were still getting pissed, they tried to take alcohol with them on the bus. They had clearly been up all night and were off their faces. I sat on the bus next to Kirsty a girl from Canberra who I ended up being tent buddies with! She was fun, it didn’t take her long to get used to my smutty sense of humour... Sometimes she would just shake her head at me. I told her it was fine to tune me out, I think that’s what Meagan does most of the time I get too disgusting. We chatted on the bus all the way to Dover and then we got on the ferry. It wasn’t too bad but when I walked through the ferry it looked like I was as pissed as the boys. It was hard to walk straight. We got to the campsite I think around 5 or something. We pretty much just set up our tents and ate dinner straight away so I’m guessing it was pretty late in the afternoon. We were meant to have a demonstration about the tents but that never happened so me and Kirsty just went for it. I think we did a pretty good job for first timers. I had seen a tent put up a few times but I had never done it, especially with someone as clueless as me. That night we went on the tour of illuminations which was a bus tour around Paris. It was so good to see Paris by bus. I had only walked around before at night. It’s a bit different when you can see all the sights at night and also have the tour guide talk to you about what it all means. Babsi was the best tour guide ever but Mushi our tour guide was really good as well, she knew AAAAALOT of history. Her real name was Michelle, I called her Mushi, even though she told me not to, she thought it sounded like something you do to a banana. I told her no that’s mash or mush, I say mushi more like Mooshi.
Anyway I’m rambling... that night we went back to the campsite. It was Kritta’s birthday that night so a few people were at the bar but a lot were turned off because the drinks were so expensive and the bar tender was annoying. He wouldn’t even fill up Kritta’s drink to the top even thought it was here birthday. I went to bed fairly early so that I could get a full days sightseeing in Paris. Again.
The next day me and Kirsty headed off into Paris, it was good I had been there before I think it saved a lot of time. It was easy finding attractions, I got us a little lost once and so we just jumped on the train which was so much easier than walking. I got to go to Notre Dame and climb the up all the stairs and see the beautiful view. It was a fun day. It wasn’t really enough time though. I felt jibbed and I had already seen everything I wanted to see. Oh and it was funny because Kirsty hates birds, is quite scared of them and outside Notre Dame there was this bird man. He sat down and all these birds flew all around us. Kirsty freaked out. The man was hilarious, I looked over and he had his arms out like Jim Carey in Ace Ventura, he had birds all over is arms and probably head. I forget exactly I was too busy asking kirsty if that was her dream job. We also went underground at the Louvre. Mushi told us that only fools line up outside hahah, that you get in much faster if you line up underground. You get underground via the metro station or there is stairs or something near the arc in out the front of the outside entrance. So me and kirsty went to the underground part, I hadn’t been there before and it was cool to see stuff from the Da Vinci Code. I also saw the bridge where Mr. Big tells Carrie she’s the one and the fountain that Anne Hathaway throws her cell phone into in the Devil Wears Prada. So exciting.
That night we had an optional dinner, a Parisian dinner, I had Quiche Lorraine because I couldn’t face the snails, they were in shells and they looked like they were fresh from the garden. I get grossed out when I accidentally step on one. Ewww. James ate one earlier that day, actually quite a few people did, the rep at the campsite gave us some as a welcome to Paris. They were cold and looked feral, I would have vomited if I ate one. I also had beef bourguignon which was amazing, the beef was so tender. It was a yummy dinner. I even had some wine! I sat with Emily, Katie and kirsty and as we drank the conversation turned dirty. Supposedly there is a park in Amsterdam where you can have sex and not get in trouble for having sex in public. We were telling Emily she should do it in the park in Amsterdam because her partner is from the Netherlands and she was meeting up with him after the tour. Perfect. That’s story to tell the grandkids.
After that we had a few drinks in the red light district. There was an optional to go to a cabaret; you get to see boobies and everything! But it was 70 euro, for the first day of the tour it seemed like so much money, but it would have been good to say that I had seen a French cabaret. We had a good night anyways, it was good to get to know everyone and alcohol always helps. It was so funny to see the difference between how rowdy everyone was in the bus after a few drinks. Mushi would say something like “Yay we’re going into Paris tonight!” and everyone would pitifully go “Yeah” and with a few drinks up us it was enthusiasm central. I didn’t stay out too late that night. I was pacing myself; we still had 20 nights to go! But we did the Can-Can in front of the Moulin Rouge. Actually we did it twice because the first time James took a photo instead of a video. Luckily we got these things called Get Lost Sheets, they should have been called Get Found Sheets, with all the names and addresses of our accommodation because we were always pissed, and it came in handy. I used it all the time!
The next day was Monday the 14th and we were off to Switzerland. I don’t think Mushi was too impressed with out packing up skills. We were late leaving the campsite that morning. Whoops. The drive just before we reached our campsite was so beautiful. We were staying in the mountains; Switzerland is definitely the most beautiful country we visited. That night we got to the campsite and had dinner and a few drinks around the campsite. I bought some of my favourite Europe backpacking budget drink, cheap white wine and pineapple juice. It gets you fucked for about 4 euro! We got told to leave the campsite and go to the bar because they have noise curfews. So I went to the bar, called the bomb shelter, had a boogie, got some red bull liqueur shots from Mushi and Steph our cook. You had to tap the bottle on the bar, stick the lid of the bottle to your head for some reason, then put the lid in your mouth and if you shot it into the middle of a bulls eye board you got a free one or something. I got fairly drunk that night, when you are travelling and trying to save money you think mixing drinks is a good way to get drunk for a minimal price. It’s very cheap but it’s shocking the next day.
On Tuesday the 15th we headed up Jungfrau Mountain, we had to catch 2 trains up the mountain. I woke up late that morning so I didn’t even wash my make up off I just made sure I didn’t have black everywhere. I also missed breakfast but they had a shop so I bought myself some. On the way up everyone was feeling like crap. Alex kept talking about hot tuna milkshakes to try to make everyone vomit. Tiff was feeling pretty bad... I thought she was going to vomit, especially after hearing about hot tuna milkshakes fresh out of ya mums bum the whole way up the mountain. Finally we all got up the mountain with no spews. It was a blizzard that day. The views from the top of Jungfrau are meant to be spectacular. All we saw was white. At one part of the mountain you could go outside but there was nothing to do because it was a blizzard. It was freezing and we could barely see anything. At another look out the winds were 90km/h and the floor was so icy. We had to hold onto ropes so we wouldn’t fall over! It sucked. We spent all of 3 minutes outside and the rest of the time we just hung out inside. It was really boring, but the chips and gravy were amazing! Me and Kirsty also had a hot chocolate and she vomited... Milk was a bad choice. It was funny. For me. A lot of people left early that day. We only got up the mountain at 11 or 12 and people were leaving at 2 because it was that boring. We got back at maybe 4 or 5. That’s when I finally washed my makeup off and had an awesome shower and got ready to start drinking again! That night we had more drinks around the campsite and Steph (our cook) and Mushi (our tour guide) sat with us as well. It was funny, Kelly told us a story about how she saw a dog looking at her so she waved at it, then she got all embarrassed because she looked around and the dog was looking at a cat that was behind her. It was hilarious. She tells the most random stories but she is so funny. Her friend Brooke fell off her chair at one point because she was laughing so hard. This was definitely one of those bonding nights we had. That’s what I loved about the whole camping thing, it was so social, if we had cabins the whole time it would have been so anti social. If you have a tent you don’t spend any time in the tent so you are forced to sit with everyone during spare time. It was awesome because everyone became really close. Later on when we got told we were too loud we went to the Bomb Shelter, which was a contiki bar so only contiki people were allowed in. All the other tour groups wanted in as well. Heaps of them were cracking it because they weren’t allowed. Too bad for them, they should have been smart enough to do a contiki. So anyways I got pissed again... I had some wine then I had some vodka at the bar and I don’t really remember what else. I think Lloydy bought some drinks and gave me one. I was about to go back to my cabin and then he passed me a drink so then I ended up staying longer. Then I went and sat by the river thing that was near my cabin with Simone... I think. I finally got to bed but I don’t know what time it was because my phone had cut out at this point. I even went and got a drink of water, I drank a few cups, but the next morning I woke up feeling so rough. I slept in again because no one in our cabin set an alarm, despite having phones that were charged, I didn’t charge mine. A. Because I was drunk both nights and B. Because other people were using the power points. I figured those with charged things would set an alarm. I was wrong.
So the next day was Wednesday the 16th and we had about half an hour to pack up our shit and get ready and get on the bus and go to Antibes! I was extreme hung over so this task was hard. I went to the shop to use up my extra francs. I bought lollies and chips, no real breakfast food. I had a few chips on the bus because I figured I would need some energy. A couple of hours later I felt like crap. I tried to fall asleep and I made myself really dizzy. I asked Sarah who was sitting across from me whether she could grab me some plastic bags, the bus doesn’t stop if you need to vomit it doesn’t stop for anything actually. So I was feeling like I couldn’t make it to the front of the bus to get bags, I didn’t know they were at the back as well. Sarah grabbed me some and before she even handed them to me I fainted. I had moved my arm rest down and I was on the aisle seat so I fainted head first into the aisle. It was classy! My head hit the ground and then my legs slumped down onto the ground and then I scraped my nose on the floor because I moved my head to make me face down. It sucked. I broke my sunglasses as well. I woke up and luckily we had a paramedic on out tour because he was taking my pulse and asking me where I was. I felt horrible! I felt absolutely disgusting. I vomited after I got picked up and put back on a seat it was fairly gross. Mushi gave me a bottle of Powerade and it took me the whole day to drink it. I ate something at one of the service stops and I threw that up later on. I decided I wasn’t even going to try to eat food till I was off the bus!
That afternoon we got to Antibes. As soon as I got off the bus I felt a thousand times better, we also had a good dinner and that made me feel human again. That night I didn’t have any euro on me which was good because if I did I probably would have kept drinking. Once I had a shower I felt like I was ready to do it all again. That’s the thing about contiki. Once the night comes you are ready to get drunk again! But I took it easy and went to bed not too late so I could enjoy nice the next day. It rained so much that night, if you went outside for 2 minutes you would be soaked. I was so scared our whole tent would be flooded with water but it was ok. They were better tents than I thought, or maybe Kirsty and I are just really good erecters!

The next day Thursday the 17th we went into nice. On the way we went to Fragonard the perfumery I had already been to with Babsi and the boys. I didn’t go in, I got distracted on the phone to mum, I ended up just going into the shop but I didn’t buy anything because I think it’s a bit of a rip off and the perfumes don’t really interest me that much. I think mum got a bit scared when if told her I passed out on the bus. Whoops. Kirsty and I just went shopping that day in nice. We didn’t really do much, just chilled out. I ate an awesome baguette. I picked myself up some vodka for some cheap pre drinks at the campsite. I was sick of drinking wine at this point. Especially after my Switzerland adventures. We were waiting at the bus pick up point and Lloydy came past on a scooter. He bought it for something like 120 euro! It was from a toy shop as well, it was just a regular push scooter, but he said he was sick of walking. It was hilarious. He had the biggest smile on his face.
Later in we went to Monaco, I had already been there as well but it was so nice at night. We went to the casino which I hadn’t been to but it was a bit boring. It’s not really the place to take a feral contiki group. It was so posh and we were not. It was great to see the place but it sucked that we couldn’t take out cameras inside. That night if you missed the bus it was a 120 euro cab ride home. Everyone made it on the bus except Simone and Claire. They had to catch a cab back and they tried to do a runner but the cab driver caught them. One of them also left their camera at the casino because we had to put them in the cloak room. It was hilarious. It felt like everyday somebody did something crazy. We had a Dick of the Day, every day on the bus we would nominate people that did something stupid the day before and they had to wear the Dick of the Day hat. At first it was this tiger thing which made everyone look special, and then that stolen and ruined and then we had this dodgy beanie which everyone added things to.
On Friday the 18th day we went to Florence. On the way we went to Pisa, I had gelati there at one of mushi’s favourite gelati parlours. It was pretty amazing. I felt like crap this day, I couldn’t wait to get to the campsite and have a shower. Half the time we had about half an hour to get ready, most days we would get to the campsite set up, get ready, eat and leave within a couple of hours. It’s not a lot of time especially if you have to help cook or clean. That night we went to the Red Garter. It was still happy hour when we got there so I got a litre of strawberry margarita. In Italy they usually free pour so the drinks are insanely strong, but its good cos you don’t have to buy a thousand drinks to get drunk... sometimes only two :) That night at the Red Garter it was awesome, there was other contiki groups there so it was packed. They had karaoke but I forget who even sang from our group. I was fairly trashed that night, Alex said the next day when he was looking for people for a cab he just found the people that were the drunkest and told them to come home. One of them was me! But I wasn’t as drunk as some, Krista and Tiff went to hospital for being extremely drunk. Lloydy came back to the campsite with Paul at about 6 or 7am and jumped the fence, even though there was a gate. Lloydy cut his hand on the way over because there were massive sharp jagged triangles all the way along the fence. So just as the 2 girls we coming out of the hospital with Steph, Lloydy was walking in. Poor steph stayed up all night taking care of people from our tour in hospital. I was so pissed but I was really good pissed. I usually get drunk and I vomit before I actually get to really happy drunk. Katie had to hold my hand on the way back to the campsite cos I kept stumbling up the hill. I couldn’t walk straight. I also interrupted someone peeing when I went to go have a spew. I thought I better spew and thank god I did because I wouldn’t have felt even worse in the morning. I was telling this guy, the one I interrupted his pee, to go away cos I was gunna make myself spew and I didn’t want him to see it. I’m so classy!
On Saturday the 19th we went into Florence. We had a tour and then we had a few hours spare time. I was hung over as crap. I don’t know why I didn’t just stay in bed. Most people bailed on the tour they were too hung over to handle it. Me and Jacqui found this guy who was painting letters that looked like all different animals. Jacqui went missing one night in Antibes and was out the whole night, she couldn’t find her way back to the campsite. Her sister Kritta was calling her a block head. Jacqui wanted to get one of the paintings so I told her to get block head. She wrote it down and I was laughing my head off. I think I was still pissed! I thought it was the funniest thing ever. Me, Jacqui and Sheree went back to the campsite early, we caught a cab back, I couldn’t handle it anymore. I needed to go back to sleep. I had a nap and relaxed that day, it was so good to be able to have a proper shower, do my hair for longer than 10 minutes and just take my time getting ready. That night we went and had dinner all together and then went to space disco. It was Florence’s largest night spot, it was ok. I think I was still feeling the effects from the night before. But also it was a little bit sleazy; there were a few old men around who should not have been there, they were way too old. I didn’t have a huge one that night. I find it hard to get drunk when I have had a big one the night before.
On Sunday the 20thwe went to Rome. I forget what we did that night. I think we had dinner in Rome. The alcohol really starts to affect me at this point. Hahaha. I think I went to bed early because I was so exhausted and I knew we had a tour the next day and I didn’t want to be extremely hung over for something I had already paid for.
The next day was our full day in Rome on Monday the 21st. We had a tour of the Roman Forum and the Colosseum our tour guide was so funny. He kept saying “Contiki, Follow the guide, Follow the right guide”. The tour was interesting but I don’t think Rome was as beautiful as some other cities. I think that some parts of Rome were a bit ugly and run down. We also went to the Vatican and had some awesome pizza that Mushi showed us. The Vatican took ages, but it was beautiful and amazing, the artwork all over the walls was so cool. That day our driver had a day off so we didn’t go back into the city that night we just had a few drinks around the campsite, a few people went to the bar or club or whatever it was but I couldn’t be bothered. Supposedly it wasn’t that good. I had a bit of a quiet one and had another decent night’s sleep.
On Tuesday the 22nd we headed from Rome to Venice. That night was so cool. There was a guy with a guitar who would play off the back of a Ute. They drove around the campsite and played for everyone. They also had a bottle of alcohol which they were pouring into people mouths, most of it got in people’s eyes and down their tops. The guy was aussie and it was really entertaining. Our group had a seat in front of his Ute at the bar and we went nuts. We were chanting and making Brad drink all his beers. Claire asked him if he had a cabin because she wanted a cabin upgrade and then later on he sang a song to her. It was a great night. Everyone got a bit loose.
The next day Wednesday the 23rd we went into Venice for a full day of sightseeing. We went and saw a lace making demonstration. We just walked around did a little bit of shopping and ate some pasta. Brad tried to take a piss in a canal but a boat went past, he told us he only got 3 drops out. Poor B-rad. We went into St Mark’s church. Brooke was wearing shorts so she had to wrap her scarf around her legs. It looked like a sarong but really tight. She couldn’t walk up and down stairs. I was trying not to laugh cos I was in a church but I couldn’t help it. Later on we went on a gondola ride. Most of us got a bottle of champagne each; they gave us each 6 cups thinking we were going to share the champagne between the 6 of us on the gondola. No chance, we were on Contiki. I didn’t really drink it all because the ride wasn’t long enough. I asked out gondola man whether he would sing for us. He said he only sings when he is making love. One of the other girls said he could take off his clothes if that would help him get into the mood for singing. He didn’t go for it. Damn it. Hahaha. After the gondola we were back on the ferry and back over to the campsite. I was sooooo drunk by this stage. I gave a little of my champagne to Brad and Claire because I was off my face. I was wasted on the ferry ride home and I needed to pee so badly. Me and kirsty were trashed and we ran to this toilet and then it was locked then we had to go to this bar and get the key. I thought I was gunna wet myself in all my drunkenness! That night we had dinner at the bar steph the cook told us were eating horse. Most people believed her and refused to eat it. I don’t know what it was but it wasn’t horse. That dinner was yum and by that point I was slightly sober. I tried to have a couple of drinks that night by I didn’t get very far. Drinking champagne in the afternoon really killed me. So I went to bed. B-rad on the other hand was off his face. The boys told the bartender it was B-rad’s birthday and he got this insanely strong drink. The guy came up when we were having dinner and poured a shot in his mouth. I think B-rad had about 20 birthdays on the whole of contiki.

Anyways enough for now! Ahhh this contiki part is taking so long. So much to write.